By Tim Baffoe-
(CBS) Bears quarterback Jay Cutler will miss at least four weeks with a torn groin muscle, or as a person who talks about poker for a living calls it…
Jay Cutler just left Bears-Redskins game, with a bruised ego; he is listed as 'questionable' to return.
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Norman Chad (@NormanChad) October 20, 2013
Or as a sexual harasser of the English language calls it…
Shannon Sharpe really slaying himself with hemorrhoid jokes after replays of Cutler injury. #professionalbroadcaster
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Dan Hanzus (@DanHanzus) October 20, 2013
After Cutler left with the injury versus Washington, backup Josh McCown entered the game and actually played quite well. Despite his surprising play, McCown’s odds of keeping this 4-3 team afloat while Cutler is gone, compounded with a really banged up defense, are really teeny.
There has to be something the Bears can do to improve their chances, though, right? Aren’t there a few viable free agents out there that could take over under center? Some really big household names perhaps?
This is the thought process of the stupid. The exceptionally football dumb. “I KNOW A FAMOUS NAME AND BECAUSE I KNOW IT AND BECAUSE HE’S FAMOUS HE IS OBVIOUSLY A GOOD FIT FOR MY FAVORITE TEAM WHY AREN’T THEY SIGNING HIM?”
So come along and let’s point and laugh at some of these precious souls who actually verbalized their assumptions or desires for the Chicago Bears to sign either Brett Favre or Tim Tebow. Who didn’t stop and think, “Hmm… Favre is probably too old for the game he hasn’t been a part of in three years,” or “Well, Tebow actually sucks at quarterback, so signing him would be silly.”
“Public Relations Professionals Declare October 22 Snark Free Day”
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maura johnston (@maura) October 21, 2013
No, they need this. Snark Free Day be damned.
Possible Favre return to the division? #bears #cutlerout #qbhelp #rumors
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Trevor Steinmeyer (@Steinytunes) October 21, 2013
#dumbass #stupid #thumbsup
Favre to the Bears would be awesome!
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Cody Larson (@xCODENAMEx) October 21, 2013
No, it would be a train wreck, Favre fanboy. And I don’t care what his agent (who is also Cutler’s) says. If he played in a game today, he’d die. Die.
I want the Bears to sign Brett Favre
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Phil Rizzo (@realphilrizzo) October 21, 2013
And I want you to be tased until you soil yourself.
Briggs/Cutler out..Sounds like we need Urlacher and Favre to come out of retirement!
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Justin Jensen (@JJensen40) October 21, 2013
Nice double-down with Urlacher. By the way, loved you in Whiteboyz.
If Cutler is out for the year, do the Bears lure Favre out of retirement into his dream situation? You heard it here first @ProFootballTalk
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The Spread Zone (@SpreadZone) October 20, 2013
AW DAYUM. HOT DAMN TAKE RIGHT HERE. LEAVING A SMOKE TRAIL SO THAT WE CAN TRACE ITS ORIGINS.
#Bears should be calling Favre, I hate seeing this nonsense about Jordan Palmer. Bring in a guy that can fling the ball and win!!!
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Travis Colby (@travalicious71) October 20, 2013
Brett Favre isn’t those things!!! You tweeted a happy birthday to yourself!!!
S/O to @travalicious71 on his 31st birthday!!!!
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Travis Colby (@travalicious71) October 17, 2013
And favorited it!!!
Rumor: Jay Cutler goes down Bears ask Bret Favre if he's willing to come out of retirement again
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Cool-Runnings (@JswizzPHS) October 20, 2013
Sorry, but I already heard that first from @SpreadZone. Your takes need be not only hot but quick.
And here are some folks that have such a burning desire for the Ol’ Gunslinger that they couldn’t even spell his name right. Happens to me sometimes, too, when my passion for a player gives me the vapors.
Bears should call Farve
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Brad (@BradBizzyB) October 21, 2013
You’re not good at spelling.
If Nazi is going to start for a couple games his ass better get a sports bra
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Brad (@BradBizzyB) October 21, 2013
Bears should sign Brett farve
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Matt Lamm (@mattlamm40) October 21, 2013
Stop tweeting in your high school class instead of learning.
Look what I just found on my desk @AlexAsta32 http://t.co/t0LhE9ptZQ
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Matt Lamm (@mattlamm40) October 21, 2013
@RealMikeWilbon bears could always call farve didnt I hear he wanted to make a comeback?
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Brandon Walker (@bWalk01) October 20, 2013
I’m sure the voices in your head tell you many things that aren’t correct. Like “Hey, it’s a good idea to tweet to Michael Wilbon!”
@TimBaffoe When will you start retweeting the "Bears should bring in #TEBOW" posts?
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Jacob Millar (@jammin481) October 21, 2013
Well, funny you should ask…
WOW 4 weeks for Cutler but more likely 6 ...I gotta say sorry #Twiiter TEBOW TIME! #Spots4Tebow #NFL #Bears #TebowTime
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Ryan Birchett (@RCB84) October 21, 2013
#meth #krokodil #sprots #Twiiter
Cutler is hurt? Tebow would thrive in Chicago
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Joe Demski (@joehasdiabetes) October 21, 2013
Thrive? THRIVE.
With cutler out maybe the bears will sign Tebow. What's the worst that could happen
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Nicole Maier (@nicolemaier_12) October 22, 2013
You procreating.
The bears should take a gamble on Tim Tebow until Cutler heals up.
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Renz Mendoza (@renzm519) October 22, 2013
How desperate am I to watch Carrie. Well http://t.co/YCu0TbgZff
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Renz Mendoza (@renzm519) October 14, 2013
@ScottTinman as a Bear fan I approve that, but would rather trade for Ponder. Ponder is not the Vikings problem. Vikes need a D & O-line.
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Brian Schulenburg (@BSchulenburg) October 22, 2013
How much wrong can be in one conversation? I imagine that if these two were actually talking to each other it would sound like this.
Jay Cutler is hurt...that really sucks. He'll have more time to smoke though. Tebow Time?
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pete sirianni. (@littleappleboy) October 21, 2013
From your Twitter profile I see you used to be an aspiring journalist.
@RealSkipBayless With Cutler missing significant time, wouldn't it behoove the Bears to bring in Tim Tebow?
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Paul Taylor (@Spikeaji) October 21, 2013
PLEASE LOVE ME, SKIP. I KNOW YOU’RE JUST MISUNDERSTOOD. LIKE ME.
Cutler's out for 4 weeks.. BRING IN TEBOW!!!!
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kevin (@kbuenn) October 21, 2013
Time for a metaphor…
this is my 15 page paper due tomorrow.. http://t.co/9kw0el7f
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kevin (@kbuenn) July 23, 2012
Also, that guy tweeted this hilarious picture once…
Picture of me back in the day #tbt http://t.co/0mABrbIYTE
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kevin (@kbuenn) February 28, 2013
…just like this next guy did amid his many selfies (though he used foul language). Get it? Because at one point we were a spermatozoon. Get it?
Bears should sign Tebow while jay cutler is gone.
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Franky J (@FrankyJay88) October 21, 2013
First Briggs and now cutler, we need brain and tebow
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Tyler (@hamm_tyler) October 21, 2013
Oh, we need brain alright.
Tebow pls I just lost Jay Cutler I need you.
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Julian (@jcswag93) October 21, 2013
Forever’s gonna start tonight. Forever’s gonna start tonight.
Jay Cutler has tear in groin muscle. Out 4 weeks, I WANT TEBOW!!!!!!!!!!
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Robert Littlepage (@rdl1037) October 21, 2013
I wish law enforcement could intervene in cases like this.
TEBOW TIME!!!!!! IN CHICAGO (at Kentucky State Police, Post 2) — path.com/p/3Req75
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Robert Littlepage (@rdl1037) October 21, 2013
Damn it.
If Cutler is out the Bears will bring in Tebow to back up McCown #sadtruth
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Ryan Castro (@Dallas_Castro12) October 21, 2013
Thankfully your bio says you’re majoring in handling people’s medication. Really legitimizes your fraternity membership.
With Jay Cutler injured, the bears season is practically over. Unless... Tebow!
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James Bardo (@JamesBardo) October 21, 2013
Aw, you’re like eight years old. I can’t make fun of you.
If aliens came in peace, would they still cancel school?
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James Bardo (@JamesBardo) September 23, 2013
OMIGOSH I’M ADOPTING YOU.
Bears need to pick up Tebow 😂😂😂 He'll take Cutler's starting job, he has Jesus on his side
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Gwap Boy Levi (@1_DLevi) October 21, 2013
“That’s not funny, and I don’t like you.” – Jesus
@salentoq Cutler, Schaub, Hoyer, Sanchez, Vick, Roethlisberger, Bradford, Locker, ¿y todavía creen que Tebow no tiene palancas?
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Fernanda Díaz (@ferdiaze) October 21, 2013
Lunes negro en la NFL, Cutler fuera!, Bradford fuera!, Wayne fuera! ¿Qué falta? ¿Que Tebow se lesione con su sofá?
#ElRefriesNFL
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El Refrigerador (@RefrigeradorNFL) October 21, 2013
Well, at least they aren’t the people that thought Josh McCown was Cade McNown.
Tim Baffoe attended the University of Iowa before earning his degree from Governors State University and began blogging at The Score after winning the 2011 Pepsi Max Score Search. He enjoys writing things about stuff, but not so much stuff about things. When not writing for 670TheScore.com, Tim corrupts America’s youth as a high school English teacher and provides a great service to his South Side community delivering pizzas (please tip him and his colleagues well). You can follow Tim’s inappropriate brain droppings on Twitter @TimBaffoe , but please don’t follow him in real life. He grew up in Chicago’s Beverly To read more of Tim’s blogs click here.